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Chivalry is dead, well at least it seems like it. I stopped focusing on finding a boyfriend.

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I wanted a boyfriend so badly that I accepted anything that resembled a relationship. For example, I was calling the guy I hung out with once a week to make-out with my boyfriend — uh, crazy.

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I started to make a concerted effort to fill my life with friends, family and hobbies and interests that enriched who I was and let guys fall into the background. Turns out, that made me way more attractive to the opposite sex.

Who knew? Once, I told a guy I liked that I wanted an actual relationship and he gave me one. Sometimes you just have to tell people what you want, no matter how scary that may be.

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I avoid one-night stands and quick hookups at all costs. I make them work for it.

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I refuse to meet up with guys after 10 p. Remember, nothing good happens after midnight.

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If he wants to see me at night, he needs to be willing to put in time during the daylight hours. I started calling guys out on their BS. Some guys really think that sitting on the couch watching Netflix is the same as going out to see a movie. I was seeing a guy whose idea of a date was taking me to meet his friends at a sports bar — I was basically one of the guys, except that I had a vagina.

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I only agree to plans that have been made ahead of time. I know I sound like a broken record, but a guy really does have to put in some effort to be with me. If he wants to see me, he can make actual plans with me. I keep my confidence high. I know what I deserve. I had to realize my worth, and once I did, I stopped seeking attention from douchey guys with bad haircuts.

Then one day, justified and all, i decided i would sit in the things that i was doing wrong.

Plus, it has the unintended side effect of making guys way more attracted to me. This is a big one! He got what he wanted. I want him to notice my more important qualities. I remember that actions speak louder than words.

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Just …. Jordan White Jordan White is a lifestyle, sex, and relationship freelance writer with a passion for giving her audience something to laugh about. She is based in Scottsdale, Arizona and despises the heat more than anything.

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This is what i told myself and others for the majority of my life when they would ask me why i don't have many female friends.

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